How men behave when they lie. How to understand that the beloved guy is lying to me? How to understand that a man is lying

Do you want to know if your chosen one is cheating on you? You have reasons for thinking this way and a variety of ways to find out the truth.

Disappointing statistics

If you're worried that your partner is lying to you, you may well be right - lying is much more common than we would like. Sometimes this is not just a lie for the good or an understatement, but a serious deception associated with your relationship or infidelity.
Unfortunately, there is no scientific way to determine if your partner is cheating on you. However, you can easily tell when he is cheating. Here are seven ways you can tell if he is hiding something important from you.

Ask friends

Other people, sometimes even strangers, often easily notice when something is wrong with someone's relationship. Psychologists use a test in which a couple must create a drawing together. One participant draws while blindfolded and the other helps him with instructions. Everything that happens is recorded on the camera. Before starting the experiment, participants are asked to answer several questions about the relationship, including whether there has ever been cheating.
After that, the researchers gave the tape of the drawing process to strangers, who had to guess which couple was cheating. Surprisingly, the volunteers guessed incredibly accurately. This study suggests that sometimes it can be enough to simply look at the interaction of partners to experience betrayal or conflict. People make amazingly accurate inferences about others in a variety of situations, and even the shortest observation is sufficient for this. At least that is exactly what scientists have come to. If you begin to be tormented by serious doubts that everything is in order in your relationship, the advice of friends or relatives can help you.

Pretend nothing is happening and watch

People are often quite bad at assessing the behavior of other people, especially when they try to do it consciously. If you have the opportunity to observe someone's behavior longer, it will be much easier for you to figure out if you are being cheated. In 2013, a team of scientists conducted an experiment in which students had to observe people testifying in court, and then determine whether these people were telling the truth or a lie.
Students who were given a little more thought before reaching a verdict did much better at identifying liars. Human consciousness does not always deal with the separation of truth and falsehood. It takes time to assess the situation. If you are worried or worried about something, you just have to give yourself a chance to orient yourself - perhaps the strange behavior was a temporary phenomenon associated with stress or other life circumstances. If, over time, you become confident that you are being cheated, you will have a more solid reason to work out the relationship.

Pay close attention to your choice of words

In a recent study, psychology professor James Pennebaker analyzed data collected by a text-grading program. It was found that there are certain wordings signaling that the speaker is trying to hide the truth. For example, liars are less likely to use personal pronouns, do not say "think" or "understand", and also less often use "but" and "except." In addition, they often use negative words such as "anger" or "enemy", as well as verbs that describe movement. Of course, all this is relevant only if the manner of communication has changed in any way - if your partner always preferred harsh language and did not talk too much about his own feelings, such words may not signal anything.

Listen to the sound of your voice

Canadian researchers recently asked a group of volunteers to listen to several voice recordings and rate how attractive one or the other sounded. After that, the scientists were asked to rate how likely it is that a person will be unfaithful to his partner.
Women volunteers most often noted that men with a low timbre of voice were more likely to cheat, while male volunteers, on the contrary, felt that women would cheat more often if they were owners of a high timbre. According to the study, men with higher testosterone levels have lower voices - and it is high testosterone levels that are associated with the likelihood of cheating. However, scientists could not explain where people got the psychological awareness of this. In the future, they will study this fact, but for now you can simply assess the voice of your partner and, on the basis of this, understand whether he is inclined to cheating at all - the timbre will tell you about this.

Pay attention to social media

If your partner spends more time with their cell phone than with you, this may be suspicious. Research has shown that people who are very active on social media are more likely to experience infidelity, breakup, or divorce. According to scientists, most people spend no more than an hour on social networks. Those who use social networks for a longer time are more likely to quarrel with their partners, cheat or get divorced. The longer the time spent on the social network, the worse the effect on the relationship. However, this does not mean that the phone leads to infidelity, nevertheless, there is still some connection. If your relationship is having a similar problem, it is time for a serious conversation with your partner. The seemingly harmless habit of surfing the Internet can ruin your life together in the long run, even if no betrayal happens.

Watch out for sudden changes in behavior

If you have been in a relationship for a long enough period of time, most likely you already know how your partner behaves under normal conditions - what he likes to eat, how he reacts to trials and surprises, whether he is a good listener, and so on. Abrupt changes in body language, facial expressions, speech patterns and others can be signals of ambivalent behavior - according to scientists who specialize in recognizing cheaters during detective investigations. A person's body shows certain signals if he is nervous and feels stress - and this is what happens when a person is lying. Learn to recognize them and it will be much easier for you to navigate what they tell you, because you will notice the truth or lies even without words.

Pay attention to silence, repetitions, or negative reactions

There is a clear sign of lying - a sudden refusal to speak. When a person's tongue seems to be taken away, this may be due to the fact that the nervous system automatically reacts to stress, and the mouth dries up. Another sign is a negative reaction even to fairly innocent questions. Finally, people who lie often repeat the question before answering it - most likely to give themselves time to come up with an answer. If you notice any of these signs behind your partner, this can be considered sufficient cause for suspicion. You should not draw quick conclusions, but you should definitely not close your eyes to what is happening.

Often, girls notice that the guy is constantly lying. What can be done in this case and how to react to it? The first step is to understand the reasons for the lie, and then take decisive action, then the soul will be calmer, and the problem will be solved very quickly.

If you believe psychologists, then all men are at least inclined to embellish reality a little, they all tend to lie, so you should not focus too much on this. However, most girls are very worried if a guy is lying. They do not know what to do in this case, and this only makes it worse.

Sometimes there is nothing behind a lie, but sometimes they want to dodge a direct answer and tell a lie. However, the fair sex react very sharply even to the smallest lies of their beloved. And they look into the future with horror, because they think that if a guy constantly lies even on trifles, then what will happen next.

However, one should not be very upset, because according to research by psychologists, if a young man lies even on trifles, then this speaks of his love. It is better to just forget about it, since it will be rather difficult to get to the bottom of the truth, since most males will blame all their blame on the girl, saying that she is forcing him to act in such a shameful way, which means that all responsibility lies solely with her.

Since not every girl can understand that a guy is lying, but you can develop this skill in yourself. It is enough to take into account the non-verbal signs. So, for example, when a person tells a lie, he often touches his face, in particular, his nose.

Often, a guy lies to his beloved on little things, because he does not want to offend her. For example, she asks him to do something, and he is lazy, here he is, and is forced to come up with an excuse.

The girl, in turn, knows that he lied, and it hurts her very much. But in this case, you can find a way out, you just need to agree with your young man that he will tell his beloved only the truth for a week, even if she is unpleasant to her.

And she, in turn, should not take offense at him and ridicule his arguments. If the girl can withstand this period of time and come to terms with this state of affairs, then you can leave everything as it is, and if not, then you need to return to the old scheme.

Thus, you can get rid of the problem of mistrust if the guy is lying. What to do in the event that a young man is cheating on his beloved and he constantly has new excuses for her? Here you should analyze the situation and understand whether you need a relationship in which there is no trust? If the answer is no, then you can safely part with the liar and try to find yourself a decent guy who will respect his beloved.

Often, men do not consider petty lies a crime, so this fact should be taken into account. In some situations, it is better to swallow the lies of a loved one than to part with him forever, so you need to close your eyes to his weakness and behave as if nothing had happened.

Many girls wonder why guys lie, but it's easier for them to live, and if they embellish reality, it is only so that the beloved sees him as a hero, and not an ordinary boyfriend. That is why, sometimes you can forgive your lover for this prank.

Why do men lie to women? How to fight this and is it possible to defeat a lie?

Women are faced with male lies almost from birth - first they cheat dads and grandfathers, then boys in kindergarten and classmates, later disappointment in first love comes and adult problems begin. The thought of why men lie does not leave beautiful ladies almost all their lives - rarely a lucky woman gets an ideal spouse, who is unusual to come up with excuses and stories. What are the reasons for male deceptions and how to deal with them?

Lie - add some color

The most harmless male lie is embellishment of events. This phenomenon can be called natural - all animals, in order to please the representatives of the opposite sex, decorate themselves and perform dances in front of a potential partner.

It is difficult to impress a modern girl with a dance during a first date, but a story about a luxurious villa, an authoritative position, a luxurious car and a proposal for a joint vacation on the seashore is possible!

Embellishing their importance and opportunities, men attract girls to themselves, not thinking what will happen next. If the relationship started in this way drags on, then the lie will be revealed. How to treat a cheater? Do not immediately push your partner away, remember that he is also a part of nature, which means that instincts are inherent in him, like in other animals.

Cheating - Pain Relief Technique

Very often the reason why men lie is the desire to protect a woman from problems. In order not to hurt their beloved, the guys begin to wishful thinking, hoping that soon everything will settle down and fall into place.

In this way, they hide financial problems, troubles at work, diseases, minor car accidents, fines. Some men do not like to reveal their plans ahead of time, so they also keep their plans secret, passing off a different version as reality.

Lies - a method of self-defense

Self-defense is the first reason why men lie. Trying to hide the fact leading to the inevitable accusation and grave consequences in the form of cardinal life changes, the guys begin to come up with new actions. In this way, as a rule, long-term deceptions are hidden, further exacerbating the situation.

For example, a husband will keep his constant mistress a secret for a long time if his plans do not include leaving the family. He will think over everything in order to lead a double life without risk and calmly meet with a new passion. This is how meetings, business trips, part-time jobs and other extracurricular activities appear. Often, not only the wife becomes a victim, but also the mistress, from whom they either hide the fact of marriage altogether, or feed them with promises to divorce.

Deception is a way to avoid serious conflict

In search of an answer to the question of why men lie to women, we must not forget that ladies themselves often become provocateurs of this phenomenon. By bothering the beloved with scandals on every occasion and without them at all, wives and girlfriends are gradually growing a liar in a partner.

For example, you call your beloved, and he does not pick up the phone for a long time, and then he makes excuses that he was late after work because of an emergency. It soon turns out that on that day, the husband met with a friend in a cafe. Why did he do this? And the reason is that the last time he was late after working with a former classmate, you gave him a showdown in the Italian style - you met him with a "sharpened saw" at the doorstep and sawed noisily all evening!

For a man to tell the truth, you do not need to grumble at him for meeting friends, drinking coffee in a cafe without you, speaking positively about colleagues, forgetting to take out the trash, not buying groceries in the store and not wanting to go to the dacha.

Lying is an attempt to avoid stupid questions

Do you want to know why men lie even on little things? The secret is that they are annoyed by stupid female questions, which romantic ladies not only come up with themselves, but also draw from serials and television shows. Think sensibly: what should a normal guy say when you ask him if he likes your new roommate or a blonde walking by in a miniskirt?

You do not need to annoy your lover with stupid questions and be too intrusive if he does not want to answer and maintain the topic of conversation. If the interlocutor is silent or says that he has no desire to discuss the issue, it is better to lag behind immediately, otherwise - to learn to lie.

Wrong - desire for attention

Sometimes men begin to deceive close women in order to attract attention, arouse pity or interest. Everyone knows how theatrically the representatives of the stronger sex are ill, how hard they endure a runny nose, cough and back pain. Exaggerating the symptoms, they just want more care, because at heart even a brutal guy remains an unloved child.

Often, with pity, men who are rejected by their beloved try to take a woman. Such compose the problems that await them after parting. Sometimes guys do not want to do something, but do not refuse directly, but try to evoke sympathy so that the woman herself will refuse the request and feel sorry for the sufferer.

If the lie is harmless, then you should not skimp on affection and warmth, let your loved one be weak, play along with him. However, you cannot turn into a victim and a puppet if the liar begins to manipulate and force you to do something that is not included in your plans.

Made up facts - raising self-esteem

Pathological lie is a terrible diagnosis

The worst reason why men lie is pathological lies. With such a diagnosis, a person himself believes in what has been said, he lives in a castle in the air created by a sick imagination. Pathological liars like to ascribe to themselves the merits of others, to invent life situations in which they have never been, to impersonate a hero and holder of titles. Telling incredible stories and coming up with facts about his biography, he is so believable that it is difficult to diagnose deception.

There are men who get so deeply into the image that they do not even get confused in the facts, telling the same story to each new victim. For example, such a man may invent that he once had a large company, and then he was framed by his best friends or ex-spouse, after which he could not rise higher.

Sometimes people come up with serious illnesses and problems for themselves, but the worst thing is that such liars easily compose not only about themselves, but also about other people, and more often than not, this is something bad.

Psychologists call this phenomenon Munchausen's syndrome, a man suffering from it will lie on trifles, not seeing anything criminal in it. For example, sitting at home and talking on the phone with a friend, he may say that he is visiting or in a cafe. What for? Just such a diagnosis.

Is it worth fighting chronic and pathological lies

It is a sad fact that it is almost useless to fight a painful lie on your own, even knowing why men lie to women. You can cry, ask, beg, shame and appeal to the mind of the deceiver as much as you want, but it will not stop. There are only three options here:

  1. Accept a man for who he is and just ignore his double life, if it, of course, does not harm family relationships.
  2. Leave this person with their illusions and start a new life by actively visiting.
  3. Contact a psychologist together if you can persuade your loved one to take this step.

To get closer to your husband, find. The site "Women's Hobbies" wants you to always be surrounded by people who can be trusted without hesitation.

When it turns out that the husband is telling a lie, all trust in him disappears and the other half begins to subject him to constant checks, not only in actions, but also in words. Below will be given different situations that can say that the husband is lying and advice on how to act in them.

Confidence- this is a very important component in marriage, and first you need to understand what prompts your significant other to lie. It so happens that lying is an integral part of a man's character and then this fact does not greatly affect the trust in the family, but simply gives rise to irritability.

There are times when the husband is lying because he has a woman on the side, that is mistresses... In such a situation, it is better to speak frankly, although such a conversation is not easy, but a necessary undertaking. If the betrayal is proven by facts, but with all this, the husband is not recognized, in this case, you need to decide how to behave further. There are two options for what to do, stay with him and endure a lie, or file for divorce.

There are many cases when a man does not have the heart to admit lies... He prefers to do something secretly without causing conflict situations. Often such a husband lies about trifles, and anger is born from the very fact of lying, because it is unpleasant to be deceived. Of course, when a man avoids conflicts in this way, it is very angry and annoying. But you need to know that such behavior is not only part of the character, but also a reaction to the wife's behavior when her husband is accused of lying. The wife's reaction can be very negative and harsh, which the liar cannot tolerate.

It is common for a woman to interrogate herself provokes a man to cheat, for example: where have you been? why so late? who called? etc.

Such behavior is laid in a man due to the fact that it is impossible to behave differently with a woman. Better a sweet lie than a bitter lie. After all, not all men have enough different virtues that a woman should like. Thus, he tries to impress her, but a woman needs to ride beautifully over her ears and she will believe, because such is their nature, and sometimes she herself does not know what she needs, a woman does not seek confirmation by facts, but blindly believes the words.

The first thing to do is to change yourself and your attitude towards your husband's actions. If he is lying that he was at work, but in fact was with friends, you need to accept his comrades. After all, even before the wedding, they were and sitting with them is part of his life. This must be measured.

  1. In dealing with him, interrogations with preference must be excluded. After all, if every evening you elicit from the husband his actions during the day, then for him the wife immediately becomes a strict mother and there is a desire to hide his actions.
  2. Try to start trusting your husband. If it seems that you cannot trust him, put yourself in his place, because he is lying precisely because he does not know whether it is possible to trust his wife. If you develop mutual trust in the family, then the lie will disappear by itself.
  3. It is worth considering whether all lies are evil? After all, there are cases when a woman resorts to various female tricks and tricks, and this is also a deception, to some extent.

So, build your relationship with your beloved not on lies, but on the truth. Change yourself and him for the better. Be happily married for many years. And don't forget that a successful marriage is hard work too.

Today, a large number of girls and women suffer from the lies of their young people, and in most cases - harmless lies.

Girls, meeting with guys for a long time, begin to convict the latter of lying, often this is a simple concealment of some facts, for example, walking with friends, borrowing money and others.

But sometimes such minor non-agreements can subsequently lead to rather large problems and scandals, since the slightest reticence and the tiniest deception can cause great suspicion and, ultimately, complete distrust of a person.

So what to do if your beloved guy is lying?

I'm an old fashioned guy.
In a relationship, the main thing is trust, and if it disappears, then the rest goes to hell.

Mickey Rourke

Reasons for cheating

In order to have a beneficial effect on a young man and try to wean him from constant lies, you must first understand the reasons that cause it. It is likely that in childhood the boy was forced to constantly report, to report on his actions, punished for the slightest mistake.

In adolescence, the guy realized that he could defend himself with lies - embellishing some events or not saying them. As a result, when his own appears, the young man also tries to hide some moments from the girl so that she does not become disappointed in him or, even worse, does not abandon him.

With the help of lies, young people try to avoid any condemnation from their friend. Moreover, lies occur on a subconscious level, when the account of actions is practically not given, the lie has become a habit.

How to spot a lie

  • The most obvious sign that a young man is unclean in words is the traditional “hands in pockets”.
  • Other gestures with which it is very easy to bring a person to clean water are touching the face and shoulders during a conversation, covering the mouth with a hand.
  • A shrug of the shoulders or some kind of grin speaks well of lies.
  • Correcting a tie or the traditional “scratching the chin” gesture can also suggest a lie.
  • The constant desire to get away from details in a conversation, fussy actions, light coughing and shifting eyes indicate a desire to end the conversation as soon as possible.

How to respond to your boyfriend's lies

First of all, one should not act as a “controlling mother”, as the young man understands that “mother” loves him anyway, which means that he will forgive him no matter what. Moreover, such an approach to the problem will only aggravate it, scandals will follow, which will lead to nervous exhaustion of both, and there will be no sense from this.

The best thing in this situation is to try to solve the problem in stages, eliminating the cause of the omissions and trying to assure the guy that the bitter truth is much better than the sweet lie - anyway, someday "all the secret will become apparent." The main rule in the search for a way out of this situation is gradualness - you cannot eradicate evil in one moment.

In no case should you overreact to a lie, since in most cases it is harmless. It is best to note to yourself that the guy “having stood in a traffic jam for 2 hours” had a great time with his friends and drank a can of beer - there is nothing wrong with that. Hid a certain amount of money - perhaps he is planning to buy you a gift, and you have exposed him.

Exposing lies is optional.

It must be eradicated over time. Wanting to look like a successful person in your eyes, a man is ready to keep quiet about a lot, just not to disappoint. And then, having caught a person, you will hurt him, which will not lead to anything good.

After a while, you can translate the revealed "secret" into an easy joke - and the young man will not suffer, and the girl will be convinced that she is right.

Over time, a young man, making sure that his failures or meeting with friends do not entail any condemnation from his beloved woman, will gradually avoid false messages.